I opened the envelope containing my license and let him take a look.  He said, "Ryan's picture has got to be better than this." 

       Not knowing when to keep my mouth shut either, I said, "Why?  It looks just like me." 

       He answered, "It's awful!" 

       Now I admit, when I first saw the photo, I had an idio-second where I thought, "I won't show this to my husband."  Like maybe he hadn't noticed that I'd gotten old and fat. 

       That night at supper, I laughingly told my husband that he would have to take over the teaching of diplomacy.  I had obviously done a horrible job.  I explained to him what Eric had said and then handed him the driver's license. 

       His response, "He's right.  Its terrible." 

       He's not the best person to teach diplomacy either, I decided. 

       I looked at the license again.  Mine was stolen two-and-a-half years ago, shortly after I had finally had one made with my correct address (we had only been at our current address for few years after all, and I had just gotten a new one right before we moved).  The stolen license actually expired almost a year ago.  I had been using an old license for identification when I cashed a  check. 

       I had actually tried three times recently to get a new license.  The first time I tried, DPS had moved and by the time I found their new building it was time to pick up my husband from work.  The second time, I hadn't realized I would need my Social Security card.  The third time after standing in line for an hour I realized that I had left my proof-of-insurance card in the car.  When I went to retrieve it, I couldn't find it (yes it was in the car - but I couldn't find it). 

       My son joked that his best friend, Ryan, would have a "real" license before I would.  I was at his friend's house when I learned that they had planned to get Ryan's drivers license that day.  I decided I better go with them.  I made sure my son knew that I had applied for my license before Ryan, even if though it was only moments before. 

       That evening while picking up his father from work, Eric said, "Mom got her license today." 

       Bill said to me, with a wink to our son, "Congratulations.  I knew you could do it."  Then Bill added, "I guess that means you will loose your purse this week." 

       There is some unwritten law at our house that states, "You'll never own a SPARE set of keys."  The minute I have a set made, I, we, the fairies, someone loses a set.  This also applies to TV remote controls, and I guess now it applies to me owning a valid driver's license, too. 

       Either I need to start looking at real-estate ads or I should consider "losing" the license just to protect my purse.  Hmm, I know that I'll never get around to replacing the current license...and the picture on the expired one looks so much better...and no one questioned it for 2 1/2 years...now where did I put it? 

By Engela E., who was not feeling her age until she looked in the mirror. 
March 5, 1999.